Like so many, you might see your marriage go from a love match to loveless arrangement in a span of only a few short years. If that is true for you then why do you stay in it for another decade or two and not make a sensible exit? What you embraced as something to have and to hold, now just feels like a suffocating grip you can’t seem to break free of. What you started out thinking was happily ever after, now just hangs, along with a sense of failure, around abed room where passion and sexual attraction left a long time ago. Functionally, you are now in a marriage of convenience. Emotional Freedom Techniques can help you know when to end it, and how to cope with the consequences.
Cutting loose from a long-term relationship is always easier said than done, mostly because of all the baggage that you carry from your relationship history, even before you start packing.
There may be children. No matter what, they will be affected by a divorce. You think of your spouse. He may be hard to live with, but he’s the one who makes a living, a responsible family man who pays all the bills since you gave up your job when you started having kids, and who still finds time to be a wonderful father. Maybe the reason he’s not a wonderful husband anymore is because he has nothing left of himself to give you. At the other end, she might no longer be nice to come home to, but she keeps the house in order, is a wonderful mother, and a genius at stretching a dollar to cover expenses. Maybe the reason she’s not a wonderful wife anymore is because she has nothing left of herself to give you.
Let’s face it, you can’t help caring about what people will say when they find out about the split. You know you shouldn’t really care about the opinion of your neighbors, and you know your loyal friends will survive the breakup of your marriage, but you do care. But what about your father-in-law who trustingly gave his daughter away a decade ago and paid for the wedding, what will he think and say? Or your mother-in-law who tells all her friends that you are better to her than she could have dreamed and now the guilt is overwhelming you.
Decent folks shouldn’t get married. You might be told to try harder, try something else to fix things. But what all this second-guessing does, even if you guess right, is to keep you trapped in an empty marriage. It makes cutting loose from a dead relationship the hardest thing you might ever do.
EFT makes deciding when to end it or when to stay easier with energy tapping. I am not being flippant. I have seen it happen again and again. EFT helps you find peace during the difficult process of making the decision. As you take each step towards a fresh start, and even during the less-than-beautiful letdown post divorce. Easier is not the same as easy. An EFT coach can help you on the long road ahead talk and tap your way to deeply and completely loving yourself even as you take responsibility for your actions and deal with the consequences.